Love does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. ~ Paul, 1 Corinthians 13:5 (NIV)

Many of you grew up in the Christian faith. This popular verse found in Paul’s letter to the Corinthians provides a strong definition for love. In its complete context, Paul uses this definition as an encouragement on how to love others. I’d like to encourage you to use it as a guide on how to love yourself as well.

Throughout the New Testament, Jesus is recorded as saying “Love thy neighbor as thyself.”  This principle depends on doing the latter in order to do the first. After all, you cannot give to others what you do not have in your possession. 

Keeping no record of wrongs is something you are called to do for and with yourself first. This isn’t a call to ignore unjust, dishonest, or immoral behavior, it is a call to discontinue the practice of living in the past and to start living in the present. To use the present moment to behave justly, honestly, and morally. As Marcus Aurelius says, “to stop talking about what a good [person] is like, and just be one.”

You make mistakes. You’re human. When you keep track of these mistakes like some heaven versus hell scoreboard, you miss the opportunities to learn from them and grow in the present. You also prevent yourself from being able to do the same for others. 

Life is short. You’re not guaranteed tomorrow and yesterday is already gone. There is no other time than the present to let go of past wrongs and mistakes in an effort to leave the old you behind and step into loving yourself in the present. 

It’s much easier to keep no record of the wrongs of others when you’ve practiced developing that muscle on yourself.