Assessment of Attachments

Anthony de Mello said the one thing that causes unhappiness is attachment. In the Daily Stoic, the authors have this to say: “Attachments to an image you have of a person, attachments to wealth and status, attachments to a certain place or time, attachments to a job or to a lifestyle. All of those things are dangerous for one reason: they are outside of our reasoned choice. How long we keep them is not in our control.”

Attachments can have a way of keeping you in place, accepting the status quo out of fear of change, but life is change. Things are constantly in a state of movement and evolution, and the likelihood of your attachments being unaffected by them is not rational. It is outside of your control regardless of how much you try to control it.

The one thing you control is how you view what you can’t control. The framing you use to explain what is happening around you and the choices you have is 100% inside of your control. You have an incredible capacity to make a reasoned choice; reasoned defined by being underpinned by logic or good sense. 

When your attachment to something or someone clouds over your ability to see all of the choices in front of you, you limit your ability to make a reasoned choice. If you fear losing it, you won’t see the choice that may make you stronger. If you’re too comfortable with it, you won’t see the option that may be the best one for you to move forward. 

Perhaps it’s time to assess your attachments. Reframing them may open your field of view to choices that assist in preparing you for the inevitable. Attachment, like everything else in life, is subject to change. While you can’t control the outcome, you can control how you see things, the options available to you, and the choices you make. 

Attachments are not good or bad, they just are. To experience moving forward, be engaged with the attachments you have in life. Always ask yourself the question, when this changes, am I prepared?